“I think media should be abolished from, you know, reporting,” Wurzelbacher said.

I agree, Mr. Wurzelbacher, the media should be abolished from, you know, reporting. Of course, Mr. Joe the Plumber is referring to reporters embedded in war zones as he seems to feel reporters do not have all of the facts needed to report the facts, but frankly if this is what continues to pass for news, along with After Obama, comes the Robots, which is a fasinating article that caused me to spend ten minutes trying to figure out what the point of it specifically was…Obama is technically a baby boomer who isn’t a boomer, who was supported by non-Boomers who…are idealists, but not like those goddamn Boomers, who hug trees and take acid. Then perhaps the media should find something better to do with their respective time. I understand a life of crime works for many individuals out there. It’s not news, it’s CNN’s blog.

I’m not a person that runs from things, but when it’s a missile, you run.” Sage Advice anyone would do well to listen too since it is my general understanding missiles tend to kill or burn people [especially if they contain surprise white phosphorus!] TMYK.

A list of the things this man runs from:

1) Missiles
2) Taxes
3) Honesty

Seriously, who the fuck let that guy into Israel?

Speaking of human bags of snot:

Bernie Madoff is still under house arrest despite being caught passing out goodies to family and friends. However, given reports he seems to have bilked most of his family and friends out of millions, maybe we should just chalk it up to attempted restitution and forget it happened.

I’m curious to know who exactly is paying for his guards. Especially since it’s my understanding that he ripped off the Russian oligarchy, and I would hate to see any of New York’s Finest have to take a bullet for this guy.

The only way this needs to go is with him declaring himself a super villain and laughing maniacally. Otherwise, this blogger will be sorely disappointed. Farewell, you pathetic jackass, you will never be one-tenth the man Lex Luthor is, and he’s a comic book character.

Don’t worry folks, after we destroy the lake, we promise to fix it and make a bigger, shinier lake! With prettier fish that will probably have lots of interesting mutations, and who doesn’t love that!

What do you mean we need to drink water to live? That’s what Brawndo is for! Everyone knows it has what plants crave!